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Common signs of domestic abuse

Domestic abuse can take many different forms. It isn't always easy to spot abuse or victims of abuse but there are some common signs of abuse.

DA - Magnifying Glass

Physical abuse (any type of harm to someone's body)

  • hitting / punching / slapping
  • pushing / shoving
  • kicking
  • burning
  • hair pulling
  • cutting

Sexual abuse

  • demanding / expecting sex
  • putting pressure on you to have sex
  • suggesting they 'will get it somewhere else'
  • dictating how you should make love
  • unwanted sex / sex against your will (rape)
  • making you have sex with other people
  • making you engage in types of sex you aren't comfortable with
  • making you watch or re-enact pornography
  • threatening to end a relationship if there is no sex
  • refusing to or not allowing you to use contraception / protection
  • sabotaging contraception (such as breaking a condom)
  • keeping you pregnant
  • making you have an abortion or not allowing them to have one
  • making you sign a 'sexual contract'
  • inspecting your underwear after you've been on a night out
  • using 'revenge porn' against you

Financial / economic abuse

  • taking control of finances
  • excluding you from important financial decisions
  • stopping you from getting or keeping a job
  • taking money from you
  • not giving you money or giving you an allowance
  • making it difficult for you / not allowing you to have a bank account
  • making you pay someone else's bills or cancel their debts
  • taking loans in your name
  • blaming you if there's not enough money
  • selling your possessions when you don't want to
  • making it difficult for you to work or asking you to quit your job
  • removing your name from a joint bank account

Emotional / psychological / mental abuse

  • calling you names
  • dominating you
  • discrediting you
  • making you think there is something wrong with you
  • making you feel embarrassed  
  • gaslighting
  • isolating you
  • showing indifference to you
  • persuading you to do something for them (e.g. lie about the abuse / change your statement / drop charges / drop bail conditions)
  • making you feel scared or anxious
  • making you follow rules

Get help or support if any of these types of abuse seem familiar to you.